Preface . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . xiv
Chapter 1 You Are Who You Are Because of Your Choices . . . . .1
A Challenged Beginning. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1
Building Resilience and Strength. . . . . . . . . 3
Empower Yourself . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 6
How Successful People Create Their Success. . . . . . 7
Contrast Shows You What You Want . . . . . . . 8
Contrast Doesn’t Need to Be Big to Work for You. . . . . . . . 9
Push toward Change or Shrink from It,
It’s Your Choice. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11
Choose Love When Fear Calls. . . . . . . . . . . . 12
Two Operating Models: Love and Fear . . . . . . 13
Stay Out of the Bubble, Stay Off Autopilot . . . . 15
A Bucket List for Success . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 16
Build the Self-Empowered Road to Success . . . . . . 17
Happiness First. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19
Getting Down to Work . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21
Chapter 2 You Are a Work in Progress–Challenge
Yourself to Get Better . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .23
Give Up the Idea That the Way You Are Now
Is the Way You Will Always Be. . . . . . . . . . . . 25
Practice Self-Control Because It Doesn’t Come Naturally. . . . . . . . 26
Use Self-Talk Plus Self-Control to Choose Your Operating Model. . . . . 28
Using Emotional Intelligence Helps You
Connect with Yourself and Others . . . . . . . . 29
Don’t Check Your Feelings at the Door . . . . . . . . 33
Build Self-Awareness So You Can See Where You’re Going . . . . . . . . 35
Avoid Artificial Limits So You Don’t Get Lost. . . . . . 39
Courage and Resilience Will Support You When Things Get Tough . . . . . . . 41
Focus and Discipline . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 47
Using Discipline to Make Progress . . . . . . . . . . 49
Getting Down to Work . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 51
Chapter 3 Do You Know What You Want from Your Career and Life? . . . . . . . .53
Let Curiosity Lead You. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 54
Discovering Your Work. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 55
If You Don’t Know, Experiment! . . . . . . . . 57
Exposure Is the Key . . . . . . . . . . . . . 60
How Parents Can Help Their Kids and
Students Can Help Themselves . . . . . . . . . 62
Understanding the Work Environment . . . . . . . . 65
Outside: The World of Work and
Where It Is Headed . . . . . . . . . . . . . 65
Inside: Your Strengths and Interests . . . . . . . 74
Finding Your Strengths. . . . . . . . . . . . 77
There Are a Few Archetypal Jobs . . . . . . . . 83
The Need for Both Soft Skills and Technology Skills. . . . . . . . 84
The Future Is Uncertain, But You Don’t Need to Be. . . 86
Creating a Blue Ocean Career Strategy. . . . . . . . 90
What’s Next? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 93
Chapter 4 Vision Strategy Execution . . . . . . . . . . . . .95
Vision, Strategy, Execution . . . . . . . . . . . . . 98
Vision . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 99
Strategy . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 112
Execution . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 117
Map Your Career to Make the Most of Your Desires . . 122
How Do You Keep Momentum in a Career? . . . . . 124
Build Next-Generation Skills . . . . . . . . . 126
Driving Awareness and Your Personal Brand . . . 129
Chapter 5 Becoming Your Vision: Aligning Your Behavior . . . .131
Use Contrast to Drive Learning. . . . . . . . . . . 134
The Learner’s Mindset . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 135
Learner’s Mindset and Growth Mindset . . . . . 139
Be a Learner to Stay Engaged in Your Work. . . 142
Many Ways to Learn and Work . . . . . . . . . . . 143
How You Hold Yourself Back . . . . . . . . . . . . 146
Blind Spots: Overconfident and Under Sighted . . 148
Blind Spots: Under Confident and Over Sighted . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 149
Blind Spots: Ego Nurturer . . . . . . . . . . 150
Learning as a Core Skill . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 150
Love, Emotional Intelligence, and Mindsets. . . . . . 154
Chapter 6 Becoming Your Vision II: Articulating Your Brand and Building Your Bench. . . . . . .161
Communicating with Others About Your
Vision — Sharing Your VSE . . . . . . . . . . . . . 162
Developing a Personal Brand Statement. . . . . 162
Value Proposition and Making the Match . . . . 164
Gathering Information and Writing Your
Personal Brand Statement . . . . . . . . . . 165
Socializing with Your VSE . . . . . . . . . . . . . 170
Working Through the Fear and Enjoying the Process . . . . . . . . 171
Purposeful Networking. . . . . . . . . . . . 176
Spheres of Influence. . . . . . . . . . . . . 178
Invest in Your Relationships. . . . . . . . . . 181
Building Your Bench. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 184
The Close-In Sphere . . . . . . . . . . . . 186
Mentors . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 187
The Advisor Sphere . . . . . . . . . . . . . 189
The Alliance Sphere . . . . . . . . . . . . . 189
Chapter 7 Attitude, Altruism, and Altitude . . . . . . . . . .191
Attitude and Altruism . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 192
Living with Intention . . . . . . . . . . . . 198
Tame Your Mind, Feed Your Heart . . . . . . . 199
How Choosing Love Over Fear Supports
Altruism and Propels You to the Next Level . . . 203
Taking Flight with Outside-In, Inside-Out Thinking . . 208
The Inside-Out, Outside-In Career Process . . . 210
How to Create Your Dream Job. . . . . . . . 221
Chapter 8 Myths and Murders: Getting Past Roadblocks and Barriers . . . . . . . . . .225
It’s Not About You. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 227
Obstacles . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 228
The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly of
Mental Habits . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 230
Problem Fighter or Problem Solver . . . . . . 236
Disengaged or Just in the Wrong Job?. . . . . . . . 237
Being Miserable in Your Job . . . . . . . . . 238
Self-Destructive Spirals . . . . . . . . . . . 241
Fear, Uncertainty, and Doubt. . . . . . . . . . . . 243
External Limitations: Mailroom Syndrome . . . . 247
Feeling Trapped . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 249
Working with Intention . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 250
Chapter 9 Planning and Making Choices. . . . . . . . . . .255
Planning for Balance. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 257
A Case in Point . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 260
How Planning for Balance Works on the Personal Side . . . . . . . . . . . . . 262
To Plan or Not to Plan . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 263
Blending Your Life and Experiences:
An Older Lifestyle. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 266
Saying No Means Not Having to Say You’re Sorry . . . 271
Beyond Saying No. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 276
Saying Yes or No to New Roles and
Stretch Goals: Know Yourself. . . . . . . . . 278
Balance Requires Trust. . . . . . . . . . . . 280
Contrast and Stress Are the Teachers,
Balance Is the Lesson . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 281
Chapter 10 Self-Leadership 2.0: Success in the Face of Obstacles . . . . . . . . . .287
Self-Leadership When Things Don’t Go Your Way . . . 289
-Isms: Sexism, Racism, Ethnocentrism, and More. . . . . . . . . 290
Begin with Understanding . . . . . . . . . . 291
The Need to Bridge Differences . . . . . . . . 294
Self-Fulfilling Prophecies. . . . . . . . . . . 297
Handling Gender Bias . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 298
Handling the Cultural Bias Toward Extraversion . . . . 301
What Do You Do When Things Go Wrong or
You Can’t Influence Someone? . . . . . . . . . . . 302
The Benefits of a Third-Party Perspective . . . . . . 302
Working with Differences in Thinking Styles . . . . . 306
Working Around Subtleties in the Workplace . . . . . 308
Build Your Bench . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 309
Do Your Homework and Share It . . . . . . . 310
Volunteering: How Can I Help You? . . . . . . 312
Working Around Cronyism. . . . . . . . . . 312
Being Open About What You Want, What You Can Deliver, How You Want to Grow, and Boundaries . . . . . . . . . . . . . 315
Creating Inspired Success for Yourself and Others. . . 320
Endnotes . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .323
9781587204326, TOC, 6/3/2016
